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An attachment disorder is a condition in which individuals have difficulty forming loving, lasting intimate relationships.

Attachment disorders vary in severity, but the term usually is reserved for individuals who show a nearly complete lack of ability to be genuinely affectionate with others. They typically fail to develop a conscience and do not learn to trust.

Children with healthy attachments to a loving caregiver ...

  • Feel secure and loved
  • Can attain their potential
  • Can develop reciprocal relationships
  • Develop a conscience
  • Cope with stress and anxiety
  • Become self-reliant

Children who do not have healthy attachments with a loving caregiver . . .

  • Do not trust caregivers or adults in authority.
  • Have extreme control problems, manifested in covertly manipulative or overtly hostile ways.
  • Do not develop a moral foundation: no empathy, no remorse, no conscience, and/or no compassion for others.
  • Lack the ability to give and receive genuine affection or love.
  • Resist all efforts to nurture or guide them.
  • Lack cause and effect thinking.
  • Act out negatively, provoking anger in others.
  • Lie, steal, cheat, and/or manipulate.
  • Are destructive, cruel, argumentative and/or hostile.
  • Lack self-control - are impulsive.
  • Are superficially charming and engaging.

The process of developing healthy attachments can be disrupted by... 

Abuse, neglect, abandonment, multiple changes in caregivers, foster care, adoption, painful illness, exposure to alcohol/drugs in utero, maternal depression, and/or inconsistent day care.

Parents of Children with Attachment disorder frequently . . .

  • Feel isolated and depressed.
  • Feel frustrated and stressed.
  • Are hypervigilant, agitated and have difficulty concentrating.
  • Are confused, puzzled and obsessed with finding answers.
  • Feel blamed by family, friends, and professionals.
  • Feel helpless, hopeless, and angry.
  • Feel that their family's problems are minimized by the helping profession.